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New Year, New You? Who Goes In Your Dating Profile?

You’ve made your New Year’s resolutions – you’re going to lose 20 pounds, stop bringing your work home, read a new book every month, spend more time with your family.

Which you belongs in your online dating profile?  The 2020 you or the 2021 you?

Know What Makes You… You!

There are things about you that are constants and haven’t changed with the coming of the new year.  These are your priorities for your profile.    For example, I love going out to eat with friends, snuggling on the couch with my cats watching NCIS reruns, and scouring the internet for whatever topic is piquing my interest at the moment.

If you need help with this list, ask your friends and family.  Too embarrassed to grill them?  I won’t judge your comic book collection or your obsession with Trinity from The Matrix.

Leave Out The Negative

Just like writing a cover letter or resume, leave out any negative references.  Are you “in shape – ROUND is a shape!“?  Don’t mention your battle with the bulge and how you really wish more women liked teddy bear shaped guys.

Just lost your job?  Bummed about the economy?  Leave it out.   Focus on what makes your life great and interesting and attractive to other people.

Identify Your Goals And Write About Them

If you have a New Year’s goal that you’re working towards achieving, by all means, write about it.  Women love a man with a plan, even if that plan is as simple as taking your dog for longer walks this year.

Don’t Call A Spoon A Shovel

Talk about your goals, but don’t make it out like you ARE something you’re not (yet).   Maybe your resolution is to hit the gym three days a week.    You’re going to be… what is the male equivalent of a gym bunny?  (Apparently, gym bunny!)

Either way, there is a BIG DIFFERENCE between stating your goal and calling a spoon a shovel.

Goal: “My plans for the new year involve using my gym membership – I’ve blocked out an hour after work each day and have even bought some new sneakers!”

Spoon/Shovel:  “I go to the gym after work every day and enjoy staying physically fit.”

While the second statement may eventually be true, it’s not true right now.

Stick with honesty as your best policy for the new year.  Know who you are and work on who you want to be.  Be honest about both and you’ll have success in your hunt for the perfect geek girl.

Online Dating for the Devout Atheist, Agnostic, Buddhist, Pagan, Wiccan…

What do you do if you are looking for love and hold a set of beliefs that aren’t so popular?

Loveawake dating site believe that everyone deserves love. I trust that my usual crowd will be respectful, but please know that I will delete any comments from this post that stir up drama between the faiths.

So what is your friendly neighborhood Atheist, Agnostic, Buddhist, Pagan, Wiccan, or (insert your flavor here) to do when looking for a compatible mate online?

Custom Searches Are Your Best Friend

Skip the usual search functionality and set up your own Custom Searches.  I have a detailed series on’s custom searches, but most sites will let you do something similar.

Make a custom search for people who fit your religious beliefs as well as any other major qualities (age, distance, etc).   Sometimes the “mutual match” features will show people who are not your religious match just because they match you in other areas.   This is why custom searches are key.

What To Do If Your Matches Are Few

  • Expand your search radius.

If there aren’t enough Buddhists in your hometown, stretch your search out by 20-50 miles and see if that picks up more hits.

  • Loosen up your other requirements.

Sure, you might not think you’d be interested in someone so young/old, but you might get lucky and find someone really mature/young for her age!  Rob the cradle (legally!) or get yourself a cougar.  You might like it.

  • Look for open-minded Christians.

There are plenty of people in the world who are Christian and open-minded about other religions. Don’t be afraid to email someone just because they list “Christian” as their religion. They may just be the cool open-minded variety.   If she emails back with the fire and brimstone and tries to save your soul, just click block and move on.  No biggie.

  • Seek other religious minorities.

You can have thought-provoking conversations about the nature of the universe and be happy agreeing to disagree. It might not be your ideal, but who knows, you just might like it!

An’ It Harm None… Do What Ye Will

Be respectful and kind to the people of the online dating world.  We are all just searching for that perfection that is Love.  That’s the same no matter what name you call God.

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